The Best Medicine

tumblr_mde4ncT1kk1qbzun1o1_500I have always been a big fan of modern medicine—maybe it’s my Catholic upbringing which implies the sciences are gifts to us from God’s grace, or maybe it’s just because I’m all about the quick fix to ease my aches and pains. I hold medical researchers, doctors and smart people in high regard.

If I’m completely truthful, I actually don’t hold the agnostic or atheistic researchers and doctors in high regard—those types think they are gods so I absolutely hope to steer clear of them. But the humble faith-filled smart doctor people have my complete affection and respect.

But today I experienced the most natural form of healing which involved no medicine, no research, no health studies, and no cardiovascular exercise: lunch with my mother.

I’m telling you, and I’ve said this before on my blog, that my mother is one of those people that lives her life the way the saints did: in self-sacrifice for the people God has entrusted to her and in complete obedience to Him and His will.

She would say, “Are you kidding me?”

And I would say, “No, I am not kidding, Mom. I want to be you…the same way I wish to be a saint but never will be.  You give me an ideal to strive for and you offer mercy and forgiveness before I even realize I miss the mark.”

I could write about how Mom goes to daily Mass, takes care of my father and mothered and continues to mother eleven children who never got hooked on drugs (ha ha ha why is that my standard, that none of us ever got hooked on drugs…ha ha ha).. and I could write about how when we were wealthy and then had hard times she went immediately to work to make ends meet; how she loves and forgives and loves and respects and loves and loves and loves her husband.  This is huge; because marriage is really hard.  Especially for me, lately.

I could tell you all that, but instead I’ll just talk about my lunch with my Mom today, which will give you an example of how to be a mother:

Me: Mom I’ve been in such a funk lately.

Mom: I know darling–you haven’t written any blog posts in almost two weeks and I miss them.

Me: I know. I’m a little worried after sending out all these resumes at the beach that some of my future employers might read my blog so I don’t know what to write anymore.  What if they read what I write and think I would make an awful employee?

Mom: Yes, maybe. But does it matter?

Me: No, it doesn’t matter. I wouldn’t want to work for anyone long term who didn’t get it.  And Husband and I are like friends passing in the hallway.  After 15 years of marriage I don’t think he likes me.

Mom: Sure he does darling.

Me: And he does this and this and this.

Mom: Yes

Me: And this and this and THIS. And he did THIS!

Mom: Yes.

Me: And here I am 43 years old. And I have everything I ever wanted: marriage, children, family, house, blah blah.

Mom: Yes. (she holds my hand.)

Me: So how are the rest of the siblings?

And then my mom updates me on everyone… All of my ten siblings, what’s new and what every one is up to.

And then I take it back to me.

Me: So I don’t know. I’m just all crabby lately.

And she says, “We have to have lunch at least once a week.”

And I say yes, yes, we do.

And we will.

Because I need her. Because my mom doesn’t judge or try to control me. My mom doesn’t get focused on petty stupid things and she doesn’t engage in gossip. My mom doesn’t like to go shopping (I really hate to “go shopping,” like it’s some sort of special event) and she doesn’t use passive aggressive tactics to manipulate me.  She just LOVES ME.  And she loves her other ten children just as unconditionally.

Like God. None of us says she loves one more than the other. No favorites. Unconditional love available for eternity for all of us.  Just like God.  So that’s where I’ve learned my concept of God, from my mother.

And my mom is my medicine.

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20 thoughts on “The Best Medicine

  1. You are describing my Mom. Cry, cry, cry. If you tell me she is Italian and your Dad is Irish, I will faint. LOL This was beautiful. Oh, and I have missed your posts too. Good to have you back. 🙂 God love you, Cindy

  2. Beautiful post about the loving relationship you share with your mother. I too have missed your amazing posts over the last couple of weeks. Shalom in Christ. 😀

  3. Oh, Number 9, that was beautiful and 100% honest and truthful. I know, since I am number 4. Yes, Mom IS a saint, isn’t she? xoxo

  4. Having a great relationship with my Mom is the best relationship in the world. I am glad that I am very close with my mom and I can talk to her about almost anything. She is like a mother and a best friend in one. I am so thankful to God because He chose me as the daughter of a mom with an amazing character. Take good care of each other and may God bless you and your Mom. 🙂

  5. What a lovely post, Regina. Add me to the list of those who miss your regular blogging. I think the idea of censoring yourself because of what a potential employer might think goes against where we are learning to be, and learning what to be – ourselves. Work is work, of course – I don’t blab about my recovery, etc. at work, but I am careful not to hold back too much of myself. I did that my entire life – molding myself and being the chameleon so that I could fit in and be liked and not be rejected. The problem with all of that is that I ended up not knowing who I was any more. I was formless, shapeless, listless. I couldn’t stand for anything because I didn’t even know what my values and morals were any more. My work knows my background. HR and my boss know I am an alcoholic and that I have gone to treatment, and hired me knowing that. No one else that I know of knows, and if they do, that’s fine with me. i don’t trumpet it, but if it ever came out, I wouldn’t really get too worked up about it.

    On a practical note about your potential employers and this blog – they may or may not find it. And if they do, they may go back and look at it and there is no hiding what and who you are and what your values are. Frankly, i don’t look up potential employees on line. I am in a hiring blitz at work right now, and I don’t have the inclination nor the time to hunt down facebook pages or blogs, etc. Why would I? No bearing on the job.

    Be proud of who you are and where you’ve come from and where you look to be. Blog what you need to blog. Express what you need to express. If someplace decides that a recovered alcoholic is not welcome in their place, then perhaps that is not the kind of place you’d like or need to be working at any way.

    Blessings,
    Paul

    • Paul. One of these days I am going to copy and paste all of your comments and put them into a notebook so I can read them when I need to be uplifted. Thank you so much. formless, listless, yes I am and you are so right! you are a gem.

  6. Wonderful post and tribute to your mom! My mom died almost seven years ago and I miss her terribly. She was my best friend, my cheerleader, really, in a lot of ways she was my everything. Treasure those moments with your mom. She sounds like a wonderful woman. On another note, I miss your posts too! I was following you and then when I checked this morning I wasn’t – weird. Anyway, I’ve been thinking about you and look forward to more posts! Hang in there – it will all work out, it always does.

    • ooooh lifecorked i am so sorry you lost your mom seven years ago. i hate to think about one day not having my mom around but inevitably the day will come 😦 ugh. XO

  7. If a potential employer were to find your blog, I agree with your mother – so what? If they read it properly, then they should see that you’re someone of honesty and integrity who has a firm faith, and who is looking for the best things in life such as love and family, and who will be a darned good employee!

    • ooohhh thankyou faithhopechocolate! i am just back on and i really appreciate this comment. i hope you are doing well and i look forward to catching up on everybody’s posts!!! XO

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