I have always been a big fan of modern medicine—maybe it’s my Catholic upbringing which implies the sciences are gifts to us from God’s grace, or maybe it’s just because I’m all about the quick fix to ease my aches and pains. I hold medical researchers, doctors and smart people in high regard.
If I’m completely truthful, I actually don’t hold the agnostic or atheistic researchers and doctors in high regard—those types think they are gods so I absolutely hope to steer clear of them. But the humble faith-filled smart doctor people have my complete affection and respect.
But today I experienced the most natural form of healing which involved no medicine, no research, no health studies, and no cardiovascular exercise: lunch with my mother.
I’m telling you, and I’ve said this before on my blog, that my mother is one of those people that lives her life the way the saints did: in self-sacrifice for the people God has entrusted to her and in complete obedience to Him and His will.
She would say, “Are you kidding me?”
And I would say, “No, I am not kidding, Mom. I want to be you…the same way I wish to be a saint but never will be. You give me an ideal to strive for and you offer mercy and forgiveness before I even realize I miss the mark.”
I could write about how Mom goes to daily Mass, takes care of my father and mothered and continues to mother eleven children who never got hooked on drugs (ha ha ha why is that my standard, that none of us ever got hooked on drugs…ha ha ha).. and I could write about how when we were wealthy and then had hard times she went immediately to work to make ends meet; how she loves and forgives and loves and respects and loves and loves and loves her husband. This is huge; because marriage is really hard. Especially for me, lately.
I could tell you all that, but instead I’ll just talk about my lunch with my Mom today, which will give you an example of how to be a mother:
Me: Mom I’ve been in such a funk lately.
Mom: I know darling–you haven’t written any blog posts in almost two weeks and I miss them.
Me: I know. I’m a little worried after sending out all these resumes at the beach that some of my future employers might read my blog so I don’t know what to write anymore. What if they read what I write and think I would make an awful employee?
Mom: Yes, maybe. But does it matter?
Me: No, it doesn’t matter. I wouldn’t want to work for anyone long term who didn’t get it. And Husband and I are like friends passing in the hallway. After 15 years of marriage I don’t think he likes me.
Mom: Sure he does darling.
Me: And he does this and this and this.
Me: And this and this and THIS. And he did THIS!
Me: And here I am 43 years old. And I have everything I ever wanted: marriage, children, family, house, blah blah.
Mom: Yes. (she holds my hand.)
Me: So how are the rest of the siblings?
And then my mom updates me on everyone… All of my ten siblings, what’s new and what every one is up to.
And then I take it back to me.
Me: So I don’t know. I’m just all crabby lately.
And she says, “We have to have lunch at least once a week.”
And I say yes, yes, we do.
And we will.
Because I need her. Because my mom doesn’t judge or try to control me. My mom doesn’t get focused on petty stupid things and she doesn’t engage in gossip. My mom doesn’t like to go shopping (I really hate to “go shopping,” like it’s some sort of special event) and she doesn’t use passive aggressive tactics to manipulate me. She just LOVES ME. And she loves her other ten children just as unconditionally.
Like God. None of us says she loves one more than the other. No favorites. Unconditional love available for eternity for all of us. Just like God. So that’s where I’ve learned my concept of God, from my mother.
And my mom is my medicine.